


On Princes, of Heart and of Hearts

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cute, Fluff, M/M, i just think they're neat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-22 16:36:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22718986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: In which MSPAR stays in Friendsim-era Alternia after the events of Jane and (unreleased) Jake Pesterquest routes, giving them knowledge of Dirk Strider, a lot of troll friends, and the perfect setup to play matchmaker. My first ever writing project, don't judge too harshly!
Relationships: Dirk Strider/Zebruh Codakk
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13





	On Princes, of Heart and of Hearts

**Author's Note:**

> I basically just wrote this to get into writing more, I think it turned out alright

Today was a normal day in Alternia. Things were never quite peaceful, but there was nothing out of the ordinary. The birds were chirping, drones were culling, and Zebruh Codakk was at the base of an old watchtower, looking for his self-declared matesprit. 

“♥ Hello! I’ve brought a gift for you. ♥” the indigoblood calls through the dilapidated tower, booming voice echoing off the smooth, cold walls. “♥ I hope you don’t mind if I let myself in. ♥”

The small, generic-looking alien jolts up in their makeshift hive, startled by the unexpected and unwanted visitor. They weren’t on bad terms with the highblood, but they weren’t quite going out of their way to meet with him, at the very least. Truth be told, they wanted to avoid Zebruh as much as possible, though that seems a daunting task when he’s on your front porch step. “Uhh, I’ll be right down, just wait there!” They call, scrambling to think of a way out. Think, think. What does this guy want? A lowblood to respect, and to be in troll love with. Looks like someone is going to be playing matchmaker.

Five minutes have passed, and while Zebruh hasn’t quite stayed outside like he was asked, he has stayed to the base floor of the tower, either out of respect, or out of fear of the shoddy construction. But unbeknownst to him, his visitee was quite occupied. 

“Alright, think…” MSPAR thought to themself. Who would get along with Zebruh? Not a troll, they’d walk away or hurt him, and they don’t want the would-be casanova to be hurt, even if he’s a little pushy. Alright, so a human. Not a pushover, they wouldn’t want whoever it is to agree to all of Zebruh’s terms… They need to be confident, outgoing, and assertive, with some interesting hobbies as well…

They need to be Dirk Strider.

Suddenly, they’re off, zapping through space and timelines, to Earth B, Texas, in the year 2425. Dirk Strider’s apartment in the middle of the sea. They appear on the roof, walk over to the rooftop door, and knock. “Hello? Dirk Strider? I know your friend Jake! Let’s talk!”

“You know Jake. Jake English, who was alive four centuries ago, on an uncolonized island in the middle of the ocean?” Dirk cautiously opens the door, just enough to see who he’s talking to. He has a katana by his side, and although it looks like the same sort of crap they’d sell at an anime convention, MSPAR doesn’t want to take chances. 

“Yeah!” exclaimed the reader wholeheartedly.

“The first person I meet in my life is a friend-shaped future thembo who knows my best friend. Of course.” Dirk swings the door open, stepping to the side to invite in their new acquaintance. The pair walks down the stairs silently, before arriving in Dirk’s bedroom. “Alright. Sit on the bed or something, let’s talk this out.” 

MSPAR sits on the bed as they’re told, not wanting to be rude. They’ve heard a lot about Dirk from Jane and Jake, mostly that he’s extremely cool, and that’s obvious, based on his room. Computer stuff, turntables, horse posters, puppets, all these things the essence of cool, condensed into plushed form. This would be the perfect person for Zebruh! He’s confident, and cool, and really lonely, and- 

“So what do you want? I doubt I’d get a visit from a time-travelling wizard if they don’t need anything.” Their train of thought is abruptly derailed, though understandably. 

“So basically, there’s this guy, and uhhhh… How about meeting someone? You’ve been all lonely out here and I know a guy who would really like to meet you!” The small humanoid blurts out without careful consideration. The situation isn’t really time sensitive due to the time-travelling nature of their powers, but they’ve not carefully considered exactly what their plan of action is.

“You want me to come time travel with you to make friends with a guy.” Dirk says flatly, without any indication that this is any more a question than a statement. 

“Yeah pretty much” they state plainly, hoping that their directness will help persuade this super cool and confident guy into going along with their plot, though not knowing what to expect.

“Fuck it. Maybe it’ll be fun.” 

Dirk and the reader zap back to the makeshift hive, with Dirk reacting far less dramatically than anyone who’s been zapped before. “So you just zap, there’s no transportalizer or anything?” He asks, genuinely curious about the mechanics of such a power.

“Pretty much but keep it down, the guy’s downstairs.” MSPAR speaks in a hushed tone, clearly aiming to avoid detection from the impatient blueblood. 

“I didn’t realize this was a stealth mission. I thought I was meeting a friend.” Dirk whispers, obviously skeptical but following their new friend’s lead nonetheless. It’s not like he has any other option when dealing with a spacetime-warping archwizard, he decided to himself.

“It’s not, it’s just… complicated. It’s cool! I’ll zap somewhere else, you can go down the ladder, make a friend, it’ll be great! I’ll be back in a couple hours to bring you home or whatever.” They prepared their zapping power, to see if they couldn’t go and make a new friend, or perhaps check on an existing one. They really just didn’t want to stick around for Zebruh’s awkwardness, compounded with the fact of introducing a new human to Alternia, but it’d be fine! At the very least, Zebruh would keep Dirk safe from any harm, if they went anywhere. It’ll be fine.

“Why didn’t you just bring me to see Jake, that-” But before Dirk could finish his thought, the reader had zapped away. Great. Now he’s god knows where, god knows when, with a friend downstairs. Nothing left to do but go downstairs and introduce himself.

“♣ Darling, I don’t mean to be pushy, you know I wouldn’t disrespect a rustie, but are you there? ♣” Calls Zebruh from downstairs once again. Due to MSPAR’s powers, Zebruh has only been waiting about ten minutes, but that’s substantial for him. “♦ I’ll wait as long as you need, just let me know. ♦” 

Dirk peeks through a gap in the damp floorboards, still attempting to figure out the situation. He spots the blueblooded troll from above. ‘Very glad they mentioned the fact that this is Alternia”, Dirk thought to himself, scathingly. He started to climb down the nearby rusty ladder, attempting to be quiet for a dramatic reveal, though the ladder was doing its fair share of creaking. 

“♥ There you are. I understand, taking your time prettying up. Take as much time as you need. ♥” Zebruh once again hollers throughout the tower, catching glimpses of Dirk’s white hair and shirt as he descends the worn down ladders. “♥ Is that a new look I see? You’ve done something with your hair, I like it. ♥” 

Dirk found himself analyzing the situation as he takes his time climbing down the tallest ladder. What might this troll want? He’s clearly got some prior relationship with your temporal buddy from earlier. What did they say his name was again, Zebra? But it’s probably got some bullshit in it to make it fit the six letter format, because this is a troll. Maybe he likes zebras. Before too long, Dirk reaches the bottom of the ladder, and climbs down the second, final ladder, finally reaching the living area of the tower. There seem to be voids in the stony brick walls, patched up with various heavy fabrics to create a cozy, albeit slightly cold, living area, complete with a worn couch and a small television. 

And Zebruh, of course.

“♠ You’re not who I’m here for. Who are you? ♠” Zebruh is inquisitive, but overall, less disappointed than one might expect. He recognizes Dirk as being the same species as MSPAR, and as such, a lowblood. He stays seated on the couch, and gestures towards the sunglassed human. “♥ Well, I’m not arguing. You don’t look half bad yourself, darling. I’m very respectful of lowbloods such as yourself. ♥” 

Darling? Dirk is gonna need to reconsider this guy’s motives. And lowblood? This isn’t the best first impression, to be truthful, but he doesn’t have much of a choice other than to make it work. And to be fair, the troll is fairly attractive, in a strange sort of way. “I’m Dirk.”

“♦ Dirk, huh? Short name. I like that. ♦” Zebruh maintains his smooth composure, and gives Dirk a wide, toothy smile. Most of his facial expressions are toothy, actually. They stick out a bit. Dirk thinks it’s a little cute, a guy so seemingly well put together to have a bit of a silly grin. Zebruh gestures to the empty space on the couch beside him for Dirk to sit beside him. “♥ Don’t be scared, I’d never hurt a lowblood, especially not one as good looking as you. I’m Zebruh. ♥” 

Dirk has got the slightest little bit of what could be called a blush in his cheeks. Seriously, this guy probably tries this on everyone. It’s just getting to Dirk that this is the second time he’s met someone face to face, ever, and he’s being called attractive. It’s not his fault. “You probably use that with everyone you meet.” 

Zebruh smiles once again. “♥ Well, it works. Don’t you think so? ♥” He speaks casually and warmly, clearly in his comfort zone, both socially and physically. Clearly, he’s done this before, though he’s right in the matter that it works. This seems different, Zebruh’s unguarded, for whatever reason.

“Sure.” Dirk keeps his words few, answering aptly as he seats himself on the couch beside Zebruh, quite far away, though Strider thinks that’s likely appropriate for a first greeting with someone. He secretly hopes that Zebruh will continue to take the lead, since Dirk doesn’t quite know his way around a social situation quite yet, although maybe he could have some fun with it. “You know, you’re not too bad looking, yourself.” Dirk teased, though not wholly insincere. 

Zebruh blushed a shade of blue matching that of his tie. “🎔 You- uh, really? You mean that? 🎔” He looks away, clearly unfamiliar with being on the receiving end of compliments. So that’s how it is.

Well, if Dirk didn’t mean it before, he did now. Fuck. That wasn’t the plan. “Do I look like I enjoy jokes?” he deflects, attempting to restore his aura of cool and hoping the highblood didn’t notice Dirk’s own blush. 

Thankfully for Dirk, Zebruh had still been looking away, far too surprised by an incoming compliment to focus much on anything else. He spaces out for a spell, before remembering that he’s got a rhetorical question to answer. “🎔 You look like you could uh, enjoy… Of course you enjoy jokes, who doesn’t! 🎔” Zebruh stammers while fidgeting with his tie, clearly nervous at this point. He had never had anyone reciprocate his flirting in any significant capacity, and he was enjoying it, albeit quite awkwardly.

“Want to watch TV?” Dirk changes the subject abruptly, cutting through the tension. He’s not completely oblivious, and he can tell that the indigoblood definitely doesn’t do this with everyone, not like this. 

“♦ Yes, TV, of course. ♦” Zebruh readily goes along with this change of subject, hoping to gain better footing on conversation with this new topic. “♦ What do you like to watch? ♦ ♥ Romance? ♥” He inquires, smiling confidently once again, though face not devoid of blue tint. He turns on the small TV and puts on some sitcom, something agreeable, and not actually romance driven.

“Of course. Romance and Troll Malcolm in the Middle. My two favorites.” He says. Dirk slides across the couch a bit, being close to Zebruh at this point, but not uncomfortably close. He’s not uncomfortable at least, and he hopes that goes the same for Zebruh. “Small TV. Right in front of you. Did you plan that?” Dirk says as he settles beside Zebruh decently close. 

Slightly more flustered, the highblood blurts out his thoughts. “♥ No, it was actually just here. Would it have been cooler or more smooth if I had? ♥” Zebruh gives an unsure sort of half smile, looking a little awkward but completely genuine. It was refreshing to Dirk, having seen him be so reserved and fake when they met. It was almost…

“Cute.” Dirk said, teasingly in his dry sort of way. It could be hard to tell if he’s kidding, but it meant all the same to Zebruh. Of course, it was no easy feat for Dirk to say, so his reasonable doubt of teasing was a shield for him. He played it cool. For once. Mostly. 

“♥ I- thank you… You’re the nicest lowbl- person I’ve ever met. ♥” Zebruh was really making an effort here. That’s some serious business. He’s tugging on his tie again, as if he’s about to say ‘Is it hot in here?’ or something stupid, but he doesn’t. Instead, he rests his hands on the couch casually and grins at Dirk once again. 

Dirk wordlessly moves his hand and rests it on Zebruh’s, still looking at the TV. There’s no other way he could do it. That wouldn’t be cool. He’s blushing quite a bit, but it’s cool blushing, because he didn’t say anything or look at Zebruh. He isn’t exactly paying attention to the show, but he sure is looking at it. 

Zebruh silently blushed, not having any idea of what to say. Dirk was so smooth. He just did it, like he wasn’t even embarrassed! Although clearly, he was, as Zebruh could clearly see by the blush on his face and the curl in the corner of his mouth. What is a flirtatious yet insecure troll to do?

Not much, evidently.

The two of them sat like this for a good half hour, one hand resting on another, not saying anything aside from occasional quips about The Troll Office or whatever was on. Both of their blushes had died down, the pair getting used to each other’s presence and warmth.

“♥ So… This is pretty cool. ♥” Zebruh stammers, attempting to be nonchalant but coming off as a little chalant. His cheeks blue slightly once again, confronting the trunkbeast in the room.

“The show?” Dirk asks, plainly but playfully. He’d surely be smiling if that were a thing that Striders do. 

“♥ You know what I meant! ♥” He laughs, catching Dirk off guard a bit. At first, Zebruh had seemed so reserved and confident, but it was clear now that he was just as nervous and insecure as everyone else, but that also had positives, like being able to see him laugh. Dirk very nearly cracked a smile there. It’s more of a smirk, really, but he’s doing it. Zebruh certainly saw, and would most definitely call him out for it, if he weren’t interrupted by Dirk leaning over and resting his head onto the sturdy troll’s shoulder. 

Nothing to say now, Zebruh relaxed, happy as he’s ever been. Nobody ever really took him seriously before, much less reciprocated. He let the TV fade softly into the background, gently drifting asleep with who may be his new partner. 

A few hours later, MSPAR would return to their hive. They’re expecting a bit of a mess, to be frank, having essentially handed off the burden of Zebruh onto someone they barely know. They appearify in their respiteblock, also known as a bedroom, with things oddly quiet in their hive. The sound of a TV can be heard faintly, but this dilapidated tower doesn’t exactly come with perfect isolation, and the TV should be much louder if anyone’s watching. They climb down their ladders and find Dirk and Zebruh, fast asleep on the couch, with Dirk resting on Zebruh, glasses on the makeshift table. And surprisingly, this time, things worked out for everyone.


End file.
